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Teenage boys have come a long way since the staid 1980s when they were all lumped into the Breakfast Club categories of Brains, Druggies, and Jocks. Crisscrossing the country—meeting with boys from different cultures, and socioeconomic backgrounds—journalist Malina Saval introduces readers to the next generation of male teens by creating new archetypes and redrawing the ever-expanding social map. The Secret Lives of Boys offers an uncensored look into boyhood that reveals the spine-tingling confessions, heartrending sadness and isolation, unbridled optimism, and seemingly boundless resilience of male teens today. Saval asks the pertinent questions: Who are these boys? What do they think of themselves? A compelling and candid look at male adolescence in the twenty-first century, The Secret Lives of Boys uncovers what our young people want you to know.
- Sales Rank: #341543 in eBooks
- Published on: 2009-04-14
- Released on: 2009-04-14
- Format: Kindle eBook
From School Library Journal
Saval notes that the conventional wisdom about American boys is, to put it mildly, that they are in trouble: emotionally, academically, spiritually, and socially. She notes William S. Pollack's Real Boys (Random, 2000) and Daniel J. Kindlon and Michael Thompson's Raising Cain (Ballantine, 1999) as examples of how the media sees boys in the U.S. On the other hand, she cites Mary Pipher's Reviving Ophelia (Putnam, 1994) and Rosalind Wiseman's Queen Bees and Wannabes (Crown, 2002) as being more balanced views of adolescent girls. For her own book, she sought to find out if teen boys really were seriously at risk, and to offer, if possible, a more nuanced portrayal of young males. On both counts, she has succeeded. Through in-depth interviews and research, she portrays the lives of 10 young males. She asked each one to name his chapter, and the titles range from "The Mini-Adult" to "The Troublemaker," from "The Sheltered One" to "The Gay, Vegan, Hearing-Impaired Republican." As comprehensive as she tries to be, she is also clear-eyed and acknowledges that "Ultimately, this book can only be one version of the truth about boys today in America." Still, it is a fascinating take on the subject, written in a clear and lively style with a useful index and interesting endnotes that can lead to further exploration.—Geri Diorio, The Ridgefield Library, CT END
Review
Allison Burnett, author of Undiscovered Gyrl
“With the objectivity of a sociologist and the compassion of a saint, Malina Saval takes us on a journey into the hearts and minds of teenaged boys, letting them do what our society rarely does: speak for themselves. The trip is painful, funny, frightening, hopeful, and, ultimately, unforgettable.”
Andy Behrman, author of Electroboy
“Malina Saval’s vibrant writing style and fascinating journeys into the lives of ten young boys provides parents with extremely useful information about how to help shepherd kids through adolescence in the 21st century...The Secret Lives of Boys is a must-read for people looking to understand the ‘mainspring’ of this demographic which we’ve been so quick to write off.”
Blake Nelson, author of Paranoid Park
“A fascinating and up-to-the-second survey of that most mysterious segment of our population: teenaged boys.”
Arkansas Democrat-Gazette
“Through Saval’s keen observations, we’re allowed to meet 10 teenage boys who are complex, insightful, thoughtful, optimistic and resilient. You can’t learn that from test scores.”
Booklist
“…Saval’s well-edited portraits reflect real-life’s nuances and messy contradictions and offer a refreshing, often-optimistic sense of male teens’ strength and resilience.”
Boston Globe
“Malina Saval has been called ‘The Boy Whisperer’ for her skill at getting teenage boys to open up (we need her at our house).”
Library Journal Xpress Review (online)
“Saval introduces us to ten very different teenage boys and makes a compelling case for the so-called problem with adolescent males being not the boys, but an overreliance on statistics and norms to tell their stories.”
New York Times Book Review
“[R]eal, funny and astute.…Parents, teachers and especially teenage girls will be fascinated to know that boys care about fashion, cry about girlfriends and have deep feelings. More important, they might see aspects of themselves reflected in these stories and realize, as I did, that boys aren’t so mystifying after all.”
Bookworm Sez
“The Secret Lives of Boys is one of those books that every adult should read, whether they have a teenage boy or not, because it busts the myths we tend to form after reading the news or hearing the latest teen-gone-bad story. For parents, Saval offers hard data that they can cling to, advice and a mega-dose of hope… If you’re the parent of a male teen or a teen-to-be (or if you want to know more about the guy your daughter is dating), oh, boy, this is a good book to have.”
Feminist Review
“I hope that everyone with a teenage boy in his or her life (or a boy about to be a teenager, or a young man who’s just finished his teen years)—or who is a teen boy, for that matter—will read this book and see that boys are just as human as the rest of us.”
About the Author
Malina Saval’s writing has appeared in Glamour, the Jerusalem Post, the Los Angeles Times, Heeb, Variety, Forward, RES, Moment, Unleashed, and LA Weekly, where The Secret Lives of Boys appeared first as a cover story. She lives in Los Angeles, California.
www.malinasaval.com
Most helpful customer reviews
18 of 19 people found the following review helpful.
Of Limited Use to the Average Parent
By Huntter
What parents wouldn't be enticed to learn about "the raw emotional world" of their teen son? He's often impenetrable. What kind of emotional support is he likely to need? How should we let him know we are there for him without being overbearing? Unfortunately, this book is of little use in answering those questions.
The author blew a great opportunity by a) selecting boys way outside the norm, b) drawing no parallels between them, and c) offering no overarching insights or advice. Whether a drug addict, the son of an alcoholic gang member, a teenage father, homeschooled, practically held prisoner by overprotective parents, or the child of multi-millionaires, none of the situations the boys in this book find themselves in bear any resemblance to that of my son or his friends. The subject of the chapter entitled "The Average American Kid" is Aziz Mohammad, a practicing Muslim whose parents were born in Syria and who attends a private Catholic boys school and meets weekly as part of a pro-life group.
"Average" boys worry about issues virtually absent from this book, and we "average" parents are left wondering how to recognize warning signs that those worries might be overpowering.
23 of 27 people found the following review helpful.
The Secret Lives of Boys
By bb
If you have an average, every day inpenetrable teenage or adolescent boy and think you are going to gain insight into their world, do not expect to find it in this particular book. If you want to read some antecdotal stories about teenage boys who are a little "out there" in one way or the other, be my guest (but in my view, not exactly informative OR entertaining). The first chapter deals with a recovered drug addict and is non-stop pop culture references. There is a chapter about a super-rich kid with OCD, a super smart kid, a super sheltered high schooler whose parents WONT let him leave the house EVER even though a straight A, super great kid! ANyway, you get the picture, there is something out of the ordinary about all ten boys in this book and each chapter is a story of their lives. If you want insight into your average everyday uncommunicative son, this is not going to get you there. I say skip it unless you are just interested in reading about teenage boys.
10 of 12 people found the following review helpful.
skip this book!
By Sara44120
Each chapter just tells the story of a particular boy; there are no conclusions or advice that would in any way be helpful to other parents. Pointless book.
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